: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
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