just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
Randomize