We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
