By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize