Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Randomize
