yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
Randomize
