I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I wish I could teleport
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
two words: eviction party
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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