HIV tests are more positive than that guy
ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
