hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
I understand Curling. That high.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
NoShamevember. You game?
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
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