since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Randomize
