my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
