Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
Randomize
