I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Randomize
