when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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