I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
Randomize