Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
They are going to name an STD after you.
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize
