i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Randomize
