I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
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