Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
Randomize
