I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
He is an equal opportunity slut.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
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