How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
Randomize
