And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
