If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
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