Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
Randomize
