none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
Randomize
