How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
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