I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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