You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
i think im in europe. pls send help
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
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