I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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