If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
why did i make a hit list last night containing only McDonalds?
you tried to order a magarita mcflurry and when they said they didnt make those you tried to call 911
im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
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