oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Randomize
