4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Randomize
