I'm lost and stupid without you.
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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