He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
where are you?
Hypothermia
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
Randomize
