at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
Randomize