just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
Randomize
