are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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