So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Randomize
