I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
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