so that wasnt chicken after all
another moral hangover. fuck.
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
This house was built for laser tag.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
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