is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
Randomize
