Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize