i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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