we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
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