We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
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