No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
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