Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
If I see one more commercial for The Secret Life of the American Teenager, I'm going to punch the next teenage girl I see in the uterus and scream, "Wear a condom!"
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize
