i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
I feel like abortions should bother me more
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
How does one acquire holy water?
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
Randomize
