What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I accidentally burped into my bong.
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
Randomize
