They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
Randomize
